🚨 Welcome to issue #3 of Generation Xcellent. I’m Stephen Perrine, New York Times bestselling author and former top editor at Men’s Health and Maxim. And like you, I’m doing all I can to survive the moshpit of midlife. Thanks for joining me on the journey! If you like what you see, send me an email—and share this newsletter with another guy who could use our help.

📩 Thanks for joining the conversation!

- FITNESS -

A Flat Belly Fast—at 45+

You won’t drop 15 pounds in a week, but with these 3 simple moves you’ll look like you actually did.

By Stephen Perrine

Drop Water Weight Fast. Carbohydrates that aren’t burned off right away are stored in the body as glycogen. But to store glycogen, the body needs water–every gram of glycogen stored in our bodies comes with three grams of water. If you reduce carbs, you not only begin to burn off the glycogen that’s stored, but you start losing that extra water as well. Try cutting all grains from your diet for one week–fruits, nuts and vegetables are still ok.

Stretch Your Flat-Belly Muscle. The more hours we spend sitting, the more our hip flexors–the muscles that run down the front of our hips and help us lift our legs–become shorter and tighter. That causes the pelvis to tilt forward–and makes it look like your belly is spilling over your belt. This stretch can correct pelvic tilt, making your midsection suddenly tighter and leaner:

Place your left knee on a mat, with your right knee bent at 90 degrees, right foot flat on the mat. Reach your left hand up over your head toward your right shoulder and, as you do so, engage your butt muscles. Now lean farther to the right as you push forward with your left knee. You should feel a stretch in your left hip flexor, the muscle that runs down the front of your left hip. Hold the stretch for eight long breaths, then relax and switch sides to stretch the right hip flexor. Repeat on each side three to four times at the end of every workout. As you become more comfortable, extend the length of each stretch to about twelve breaths.

—Adapted from The Full-Body Fat Fix, by Stephen Perrine (St. Martin’s Press).

- GEN-X CULTURE -

You Decide: Battle of the ‘90s Crushes

Winona or Courtney? Alyssa or Molly? A March Madness–Style Showdown of the Women Who Shook Our World

By The Editors of Generation Xcellent

>You never forget your first love… or your first celebrity crush.

How many after school hours did you spend at home, hoping MTV would play “Just a Girl” or “Walk Like an Egyptian”—and not because you actually loved those songs? How many Thursday nights were eaten up trying to decide between Monica and Rachel? Our dads may have had Playboy at home and Faye Dunaway on the big screen, but our crushes played on endless loops in our living rooms. How could we possibly pick a favorite?

We’re going to try anyway. We’ve narrowed it down to 16 finalists who rocked our world in the 1990s—including beloved sirens like Winona Ryder, Alyssa Milano, Molly Ringwald, Jennifer Aniston, Susannah Hoffs, Salma Hayek, Uma Thurman, and Lisa Bonet, among many others—who’ll face off in a March Madness-style showdown over the next several months. Who gets to decide the winner? You!

Here’s match #1. Gentleman, pick your favorite:

PHOEBE CATES vs. VANESSA WILLIAMS

It’s the Rumble Between the Queens of Full Frontal! Will you pick Cates, the genie in the red bikini, and the reason every VHS copy of "Fast Times at Ridgemont High" was paused at 53 minutes and 5 seconds? Or does your heart belong to Williams, the former Miss America, pop star, Corn Flakes box model, and accidental Penthouse magazine exhibitionist?

We’ll have a new showdown every week, with more Gen-X goddesses competing for your vote. And check out our social pages (we’re on Instagram, Facebook, and Threads) for updates and a full rundown of the winners.

- FATHERHOOD -

What Every Dad Should Tell His Son About Internet Porn

We know they’re watching it. So what now?

By Eric Spitznagel

>I don’t know a lot about parenting, but I know it’s never a good thing when your 13-year-old son casually mentions during dinner, “What’s a bukakke?” That’s a pretty huge air siren that it’s time to talk to your kid about internet porn.

I’m not one of those dads who gets anxious about porn. I know it’s out there, and I know my son will find it. A 2023 report from Common Sense Media found that 54% of teenagers have seen online porn by the time they reach 13. But when I was 13 in the mid-80s, considerably more than half of my guy friends knew the name Ron Jeremy. So, I don’t know… maybe this is progress?

A lot has changed since we were horny teenagers. The laughably quaint porn of our youth is long gone. The internet has become the Costco of fetishes. If you can imagine it, it's out there, and your kid can download it within seconds—just another pervy distraction he can watch on his phone when he’s bored with TikTok.

So what’s a dad to do? I reached out to Emily Rothman, PhD, a Professor of Public Health and Occupational Therapy at Boston University. She’s given TED talks on teens and porn, and helped develop a porn literacy curriculum for adolescents. She graciously provided this road map to the most awkward conversation of our parenting lives.

Keep it simple, private and direct

Make sure it’s just the two of you, and ideally somewhere that doesn’t require eye contact (like during a car ride.)

“Ask permission to say something that’s been on your mind,” Rothman says. “You might even give advanced warning that what you want to say is about porn, which could result in a laugh or eye roll.” Let them know that you just want permission to say one thing and you don’t need them to say anything in response. “If they agree,” she says, “the stage is set and you can say your one thing.”

Okay, um... what should my one thing be?

The ugly truth. Tell him that porn “can make people bad at having sex in real life because almost all of it is created to make money, or get clicks or likes,” Rothman says. “It’s the exact opposite of an instruction manual on what to do with a person you care about and are trying to make feel good.”

Tell him that there are better places to learn about the nuts and bolts of sex and they don’t involve watching actors with meth addictions choke each other out before having sad orgasms. Like Bedsider, Sex Etc, and Scarlateen.com.

Remind him that porn is just Star Wars but with dicks instead of lightsabers

In that Common Sense Media study of teens and porn—which, coincidentally, Dr. Rothman helped conduct—just 27% of teens admitted thinking that porn is an accurate reflection of reality. “Most teens know that porn is a paid performance,” says Rothman.

But, 45% of those same teens think that they can get helpful information about sex from watching porn. Which is as ridiculous as watching Star Wars to learn how to win a fight. Those lightsabers aren’t real, and neither are those gigantic porn dicks.

Yes, it’s a dated reference. But they won’t be able to watch another porn without thinking of lightsabers.

Don’t expect a lot of feedback

Remember that time your dad asked you about porn, and you admitted you watched it all the time, and there’s this one video—Edward Penishands, I believe it was—that you think is especially hot, even though it’s kinda weird?

No? Not ringing any bells? That’s because that conversation never fucking happened. And it’s not happening with your kid, either. All you can get across is that you’re aware, you’re not judging him, and you have concerns. Keep it shorter than a TikTok video, and don’t expect adulation or follow-up questions. He’ll be fine. Sometimes just knowing your dad is on your side goes a long way.

Also, when I finally mustered the courage to ask my kid about bukakke, he admitted that he was pretty sure it was a Pokemon character. So at least for now, I can still sleep soundly.

—Eric Spitznagel has written for Playboy, Esquire, Rolling Stone, and the New York Times Magazine. He’s the author of a Old Records Never Die: One Man's Quest for His Vinyl and His Past.